BREAKUP COUNSELLING : (PART: 1)


“Breakups suck. I never type that word here, but today I am. Because breakups really, really suck, is often been stated by my client”.
Other client told me “Doctor, I am shaken and moved in, I know it is not good but cannot control”
The relationship, are basically wonderful connections, they keep us partnered, certain, focused and centered. The relationship gives us quality strength; it influences us to feel completely filled however it comes with its own offer of ups and down. These battles at times do take incredible monstrous ugly turns bringing about breakups.  The end of a relationship or breakup can flip your world upside down and trigger a range of emotions making a person anxious or depressed. Some people quickly accept the breakup of a relationship and move forward, but others need to deal with anxiety, depression and obsession.
Managing or overcoming a breakup or separation is easier said than done. We are more disposed to instant delight and instant help for discomfort. At such circumstances, we swing to our companions for comfort in such circumstances. Regularly than not, what we get the chance to hear is:
  • ‘dude take care of business and get over it’
  • ‘let’s host a breakup or separation party, alcohol, cry and the following day you’ll be fine’
  • ‘Let’s go shopping for chill’
  • ‘will demonstrate to him what you merit’
Despite the fact that well-meaning, these moment and convenient solutions offered to us may divert ourselves for a brief timeframe or numb the torment or pain for some time yet don’t resolve the void and hurt we encounter.
The sign & symptoms of the breakup are:
As a psychological well-being experts, we truly concur dealing with a breakup is indeed a challenging task because the loss is irrevocable, the pain is unexplainable, the feeling is uncontrollable, the state of mind is an overwhelming, emotional and psychological investment in the person is gone for a toss for some. Loss of interest, agitation, hopelessness, excessive or lack of sleep, appetite, detachment and lost social interest takes charge and control in the breakup.

Some of the Reasons for Breakup

Verbal CuesNon-verbal Cues
AgitatedAngry behaviour
DepressedEmotionally exhausted
IsolatedExcessive or binge eating
Lack of acceptanceExcessive spending
Talking about memories repeatedlyDisturbed sleep cycle
Aggressive or violent over trivial mattersStalking on social networking sites
Disturbed routineActing out to be moved on
OverthinkingChecking the Partner
  • Abuse

The relationship can be abusive in many ways be it emotional, sexual, physical or psychological in nature it includes isolation, threats, and intimidation and lead to deterioration of the relationship and eventually its end. When somebody utilizes abuse and brutality against an accomplice or partner, it is a dependable part of a bigger example of control.
  • Incompatibility

Class, status, conduct, emotional and mental understanding of one another and life situations.  The five pillars of incompatibility are sexual incompatibility, emotional incompatibility, intellectual incompatibility, spiritual incompatibility, and financial incompatibility.
  • Infidelity

Realizing one’s partner is unfaithful and cheating on you emotionally or sexually is referred to as infidelity.   It can crush even the most grounded relationship, deserting feelings of offering out, fault, shock and anger. For the one-fourth of married couples who have suffered through this breach of loyalty, vanquishing those feelings can be to an incredible degree troublesome.
  • Misunderstanding

Very often we are unable to candidly express or explain the cause of our behaviour or words. We might be scared however it is manifested as anger. There are additionally numerous other outer powers that mediate in our relationship prompting miscommunication and misjudgment of over a wide span of time.
  • Societal pressure or norms

Sometimes family and society’s interference and un-acceptance of one another may be a reason for parting ways.
  • Unfulfilled Expectations

We all have some expectations from our partner, we are also ready to adjust and compromise few things here and there, but in long run, these unfulfilled expectations from the partner may lead to an unhealthy bond.
Such difficult and overpowering circumstances can be managed systematically and strategically in a therapy session where the point is to enable you to beat breakup according to your reaction and resistance level and move towards passionate healing.
PWC & DC offer counseling package on move-on after a breakup deals with
  • Identify the issues of breakup including negative thoughts and emotions
  • Manage overwhelming emotions
  • Manage with self-blame or self-criticism, hopelessness,
  • Logically working with Rational issues the  situations and user-focused solutions
  • Move on  responsibly and with positive self-worth and confidence

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